R-A-T Spells . . .

Well, I’ve discovered a new problem with rats. I didn’t know they could be more aggravating and disgusting than they already are. Apparently, they can chew threw the wires in your car causing extensive and costly damage. Dana and I had heard “something” in our attic for a little while during the winter. We suspected it was some animal who came in to keep warm. Neither one of us really wanted to go into the attic to discover what it was, and we were hoping it would just go away. (Man, we are bad lesbians; at least one of us should be handy and not mind rodents or bugs.) Plus, I hate dealing with traps b/c of the after effect, and we were reluctant to put out poison b/c of the kids and Zoe, and b/c if the rat died somewhere in the house/attic, the stench would have been awful. (We had this when some suspected field mice died in our walls in Wisconsin.) But, we stopped hearing the noises, and never saw any signs of rodents inside the house, so we assumed all was well. After all, rats, sadly, aren’t uncommon in TX, even if your place is spotless (not that our house is spotless, but still, it’s not rat-infested filth). When we went through our garage last week for our garage sale, we noticed several rat droppings, so we had solved the mystery. However, the weather had warmed, and attics and garages get hot quickly, so we assumed our rodent problem had left. Then, a couple days ago we had a “cold” snap, and it appears it has returned.

I went to take Beckett to school today, and the check engine light was on. This didn’t really alarm me, b/c it comes on if I’ve refueled within a week and the weather has abruptly changed in temperature (both of which had happened). This is reportedly “normal.” (side note: the dealership mechanics seem totally unconcerned by this occurrence, despite the manual stating in BOLD ‘do not drive the car.’) But, the “D” for “drive” was also flashing, and I was having trouble accelerating from stop. A quick check with the manual said I could have a transmission problem. So, I drop Beckett of at school, which is on the way to the dealership, then head off to Honda. I figure they’ll tell me it’s some weird malfunctioning warning light thing again. But, no, the guy’s like “uh, we need you to turn off your car,” and they run a diagnostic check. An hour later, clearly with the wrong son at a place full of cars (though, truly, Kyler had a lot of fun playing with the bead toy, playing peek-a-boo with the salesman, who were doing anything but selling cars, and pouring bottled water all over himself and the carpet (nice way to learn he’s developed the skill of unscrewing bottle caps), plus, I got to read up on who might win the presidential election and how the fundamentals of our economy are strong and big sales are expected for Christmas to solve all the problems.

So, after an hour or so, the service rep comes to get me, and says I have a serious problem. It has to do with the R-A-T. Yeah, he spells it out, so I’m thinking he’s giving me an acronym for some car part I’ve never heard of. I say, “R-A-T? Oh, you mean rat!?” “Yes, you had a rat in your engine. I was going to take a picture for you, but I thought I’d just let you look at it yourself.” I’m not sure why he first thought to snap a photo, as I was right inside. Whatever. I’m expecting to see a dead rat melted to my engine block or something horrific like that. But, no, instead I see chewed wires. Almost completely gnawed through so that just a few little copper strands of wire are connecting some kind of wiring contraption to my transmission (yeah, I didn’t just know they connected to the transmission; they had to point that out.) The guy says, “You’d be surprised how often this happens. Several times a month. Do you live in a rural area?” “No. I live here, in the city. The car stays in the garage.” “Oooh, you should get some traps.” Great advice.

Well, as ‘car engine mistaken for rat food’ is not covered under warranty (and why not, I ask? Shouldn’t Honda in some way be liable for manufacturing engine parts that taste yummy to rodents? I mean, seriously, didn’t they see this coming?), I’m told to file an insurance claim. The estimated cost to repair this entire wiring block that runs the transmission is $1300. Because of one *&%#$ rat!! If I’d had even the slightest suspicion that the annoying sounds we heard in our attic could end up costing us $1300 in car repairs, I would have just mustered the courage to lay out some traps. (But, the mechanic said it looked like the chewing was recent, as there are no signs of corrosion. So, it probably happened in the past 2 days when I didn’t drive the van.)

Now we just have to wait for the insurance adjuster to get herself out to the dealership to finish the claim. I’m told she’ll be out there between now and next Wednesday, so it’s good to know they work like the cable company. Meanwhile, the dealership loaned us an Accord that’s oddly the same size as Dana’s Civic.